The Return of the Hogyoku
by Thekatanasisters
Summary: Three weeks ago a new antagonist put his plan into action. His Fraccion was captured and Mayuri placed a manufactured soul in her. Now part of division nine she works for her safety. Now a small girl is found in the woods with no memory? contains OC's
1. Chapter 1

This is a bleach Fanfiction. All original characters belong to the creators of bleach. Neither i nor my co writer own anything.

Mana and Matsuki are written by two different people. I"m editing this right now and i realize i got the twelfth confused with the ninth. I've corrected what i can find at the moment. It should only be a problem in this first and second chapter.  
>Please enjoy, yada yada yada.<p>

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><p><strong>Mana's POV<strong>

There was something about loneliness I completely understood at that part of my life. Maybe it was something I didn't understand until I knew all of them. Not people. They weren't anymore. In a flash of blinding light and excruciating pain I was given a soul. No. no. that wasn't right. Souls, multiple pieces. It didn't seem fair to me. But forgive me; I'm getting ahead of myself. His name was Haru. I was never given the privilege to knowing the rest of his name. Numerous Espada number nineteen. He hated Aizen. I mean, there was hated and then there was his form of hatred. Aizen had pushed him back nearly eighteen spaces too many. He wanted to be where Stark was or better yet where Yammy was.

We were being ignorant really. The way we marched into the town like we could actually do this without a hitch. Who were we fooling? Ourselves apparently. Because of that I'm where I am. Haru brought me, his one Fraccion member to the Soul Society. We managed to get in….Only the mortal God would know how. I know we entered through the Senkimon. We fooled it someway, after Ulqiorra got into it, it only made sense we could. Though, neither of us are as…I mean were as strong as he was. After everything was done we were two of the remaining Arrancar.

Possibly we were supposed to be wiped out. We were meant to be hollows. We were meant to be soulless creatures who fed on others to stave off our own loneliness. We took Aizen up on his word though. Haru made me who I was. Our footsteps echoed softly in the city, at least his did. I never wore shoes. My bare feet were light on the ground, barely disturbing the dust resting on the stone streets. His blonde hair was unmoving, sticking straight up in every direction. His pale green eyes stayed tuned in front of him. I remember them particularly that night. They always held a soft glimmer of a smirk touching them. It reminded me of that bastard Gin. We got into arguments about our hair. I still say mine's prettier than his. That's my opinion though. My own rib cage long sheet of hair blew with the soft wind, strands moving in front of my eyes. It was so different from Los Noches but it was just like it at the same time. There was still a sense of imprisonment there.

"Manashitsugmi," his voice mused. It was light at the moment. It never lasted. There hadn't been a moment since I knew him where it had lasted. My pale purple eyes turned up to him, the moon light reflecting off of the darker flecks in them. The pupils were large, compared to normal at least. I blew a stream of air out of my lips while pushing my hair out of my face. My arrancar outfit did little to protect against any cold. It wasn't as though I felt it anymore though. Any feeling would be good. I want to know how Ulqiorra did it. We spoke about it. Briefly in passing. We both felt things differently. We were…we were learning. Learning was our down fall. My hair fell between my shoulders after a bit of manipulating it. The top of my black and white outfit never slipped. It had no straps so one would think it would. The black bar around the top of the white cloth almost touched the hole placed on my left shoulder.

My eyes turned down to my pants for just a moment. The long legs dragged slightly on the ground, billowing around much like my own hair. "We're close. Change your expression," Haru said patting my head lightly. I simply nodded once watching the back of his uniform has he walked. His body towered over mine. I was short. I knew it. I was only five foot four. Compared to most of the men I was around I was short. The women too. They didn't mock me though. That was my job. No one could do that job better than me.

I placed my hand on the hilt of my sword for a second, taking a deep breath. This was crazy. The Hoguku wasn't something to be messed with. Haru and I had both watched as Aizen fell. I followed close to him after that. There was a sense of foreboding imbedding itself in my bones. I held my hands behind my back, just as he did. My eyes stayed in front, just as his did. I kept my ears open. I wasn't as careless as he was. Wasn't that the original problem? Possibly. I didn't have much time to think of this. Within seconds he had blasted a whole through a wall with his cero. It came out of his hand. So did mine. I was always glad to not have to deal with Cero coming out of my breasts or something. There were some weird places it came out of. For the record and all.

After that it was all downhill. The simple fact of the matter was we were stronger. Months and months training had left us smart. But there was my downfall. Learning had made me confident. I was an Espada. I wasn't meant to be confident. After that everything was a blur. I remember someone snatching me from my neck, Haru disappearing the hoguku in hand. He had left me. His own fraccion. It was expected though. I remember his snide wave as that bloody long needle was inserted into my neck.

When I woke up I was strapped down to a table left only in my underwear. Needles were inserted into my arms, sticky pads attached to cords placed on my temples and above where my heart was. I struggled against the straps, up until a yell ripped its way free from my throat. There were things inserted in my neck too. Deeply actually. It felt like they reached all the way through. I could hear the voices of other people in the room. My eye sight was filled with blind spots from the pain though. Somewhere I thought I felt a semblance of happiness though. I had felt something. "Nemu! None of these are complete!" a male voice yelled. Something about it felt off. It sounded off too. I tried not to listen after that. I could feel someone poking around the hole in my shoulder. It was a numbing feeling. It tingled almost.

There was the sound of air rushing out of a pump then I felt something cold flow through the needles in my neck. It turned warm within moments. That's where there was light. They were there. They filled the hole with their happiness. Their memories, their loves, life, death. I don't know when it stopped. I remember someone placing something in my mouth. I guess I was screaming. I can't say I prefer to think back on that.

When I woke up I was in a room, it was more comfortable than the last. My hair was splayed around me on a bed, my body aching. I pushed myself up into a sitting position only to let out a loud groan and fell back onto the mattress. The soft fabric greeted me less than kindly actually. I rolled over off of the bed and onto the floor. It was hard to use my left arm. My bare legs dragged across the floor, my body, I now noticed, garbed in a borrowed pair of shorts and a tank top. I lifted myself up with my good arm, biting back the pain. I turned my eyes back to look back at the hole that filled my shoulder only to find a thick black ring in its place. The twenty was still in place on my wrist.

I felt something flood through my head and girl with soft brown hair that flowed around her face. Her bright almond eyes were smiling up at me. Or it wasn't me. "Hiya mama!" the girl said holding up a handful of meager yellow flowers. I shook the thoughts away, I tried. That wasn't me. That was someone else. "I picked these for you," she said her smile widening when a tan hand reached out and took them.

That wasn't me! This never happened to me. I wasn't a mother. I wouldn't be one. I refused to believe that it was anything more than a passing effect of whatever they did to me. "How's it feel to have a soul again, Espada?" someone asked from the door way. I turned my head, my arm falling out from under me in that moment.

"This isn't….isn't right," I said, my voice hoarse and scratchy. A wad of clothing was thrown at me, the uniform the opposite of my Arrancar uniform. The design was different. It'd cover up the large circle on my shoulder and the twenty on my wrists. As the final piece of clothing drifted to the floor I watched as he left, a girl with short black hair walking behind him. At the last moment she turned and I swear I heard her say something.

If I did it was, "Welcome to the twelfth Division."

That was three painstaking weeks ago. Three. IF anyone ever knew how terrible it was to have nine different souls inside of them then they should understand this. Every day was the equivalent to ten to me. I saw different memories at different times. It was a pain in my ass when I was trying to fight. No one knew who I was though. They all thought I was Manashitsugmi, the young girl who graduated with the rest of the academy. No one ever saw me without sleeves, no one saw my shoulder.

The tattoos I had from my days as a member of the Fraccion were still in place. There were the birds across back, the words that creeped down my right arm, the only one without a sleeve. It was as though Captain Mayuri simply ripped a sleeve off of my uniform. Lazy. I couldn't say I liked him. I hated him. With a passion actually. If I ever got the chance to kill him I would. But unfortunately someone in me wouldn't let me. I wasn't being persecuted as an enemy to the Soul Society. No one but Mayuri and Nemu knew what happened that day.

My white hair was down cascading down my back. My head was cast down, something used to not be done. I was always worried that someone would see me and know, "hey. She's a bad guy. Kill her." Three weeks and no one had. I worried too much. No. I didn't. It was completely understandable. I was a bad person. This was what guilt was like. I don't like it at all. It was just terrible. I can't understand why the hell normal people would want souls. I was starting to miss having the hole.

Spring was nice. Hueco Mundo doesn't have spring. I look around at the people around me. Most are in groups, smiles on their faces and talking about the latest gathering. I wish I could walk down the streets of Seretti and not worry like they do. I wish. It was starting to become poison to me. The first division had covered up the stolen item well. Soul Society didn't know. They wouldn't know until the Captains meeting. I dread that moment. "I hate you Mayuri," I mutter, my hand reaching up to tentatively touch the needle scar that was on my neck. There were four in total, evenly spaced. I was his new project. I think I'm starting to pity myself.

**Matsuki POV**

Darkness, that's all I see is darkness. All I know is that my name is Matsuki. I slowly crack my eyes open to see a leave in front of me. Blinking I slowly push myself up onto my hands and knees before I stand up. Looking down at myself I see that I look like a 10 year old girl…so I guess I am a girl. Looking around I tried to find any answer to where I am or how I ended up here.

"Hello?" I called out softly. I received no answer. I looked to my left and saw the top of a building. I decided to make my way towards the building.

I walked for I think about 20 minutes before I heard a twig snap behind me. I turned around quickly but I saw nothing behind me. I started walking again this time a little faster, another twig snapped and I turned around quickly only to see nothing again.

"Hello?" I called again hoping for an answer. When I received none I started to run towards the building. I looked back behind me to see if anyone was following me but I ended up running into something hard. I screamed and closed my eyes before everything went black.

**Mana's POV**

"Mayuri's white girl!" a loud voice yelled behind me. Internally I groan. I know the voice. Along with the heavy feet. I turned my head to see Kenpachi Zaraki walking toward me. Honestly I didn't want anything to do with the oaf at the moment. He was…power crazed. Haha…Power crazed. I'm an Espada! That's my job. Silly me. I turn slowly, my bare feet sliding in the dust that at one point in their life had not disturbed it. "come with me," he ordered, pointing a large meaty thumb in the direction of the forest. The amethyst orbs that made up my eyes shifted toward the tree line, a soft puff of smoke coming up from the trees. Was this supposed to be interesting? I saw things like that all the time on Hueco Mundo. He was my captain now so I had to listen to him. Well he wasn't my captain per say..

The man turned, not waiting for my answer which wasn't coming. If anything slipped out of my mouth right now I'd get a slap across the face. To say I was still getting used to the concept of being ordered around by these people. I was used to Haru. That low down, sleazy, rat faced, green eyed, plant boy! No. No. I wasn't bitter. No. why on earth would I be bitter? Because I for one am totally cool with having a soul. Actually nine souls. Plus one large vacancy that was my actual soul.

I take a deep breath before beginning to walk behind him. The skirt of my uniform swayed slightly at my knees. My pale legs stuck out from underneath it. They all but matched my hair. I had to say I didn't look half as washed out with the black uniform than the white one. I saw the pink head of the Lieutenant peeping up over his shoulders. There were many people who I actually hadn't met. There were days when I didn't even leave my room. Others when I didn't leave the Division housing.

Within minutes we were met with the Captain of Division six and his lieutenant. The spikey haired red haired kid ignored me. He was the only one though. Byakuya turned his head slightly, glancing back to me with his eyes. It only took him three seconds to assess me and I felt a bit naked again. It was that way every time someone looked me over that way. It was unnerving. I caught up to the edge of the group, hiding back behind Kenpachi. It wasn't really hiding per say. It was just something to avoid my usual defense mechanism of "What the hell are you looking at?"

I know. I know. It is silly but I just don't like being looked over with that kind of look. Too much of Aizen. They all were too much like Aizen. The three ahead of me talked amongst themselves. I liked it. I could avoid trying to talk to them that way. I could get whatever this job was done. Report back to my jerk of a captain and do paper work the rest of the day. That or go down to the lab with Nemu to do tests. All so tempting. The ground quickly turned into the dirt and grass of the forest ground.

I broke off from the other three and circled around. I knew enough to get that if someone tried running then they'd go the opposite direction. If I blocked that then they were trapped like a fly in a spider's web. The voices faded off and my footsteps blended into the sounds of the tree and the wind. I don't know how she didn't notice me. She was laying on the ground. That's when I realized that she was out. Not like out cold but maybe sleeping. Something in between. I watched as she sat up and called to someone. When she started walking I couldn't help but follow. After a while I got into a slight daze. The fact was she wasn't very interesting and the other three were doing a very bad job at finding her.

Then I snapped a twig.

It wasn't something huge. My foot slipped on a rock and snapped the small dry thing. The girl turned around quickly, my own body fading back into it's arrancar state. It was still there. I pressed myself up against the side of the tree, fading slightly into it. It was enough for her eyes to pass over me. That was when she started walking again. Good. Good. Then I take five steps and then I see him.

He was short but not too short. He had his arms wrapped around my waist, his head resting in the crook of my neck. "Zero, don't worry about it. He's gone. Aizen's gone," my voice said. Well it wasn't my voice. It was warmer, like it had honey mixed into it. Then I saw Nemu. She was walking toward the two of us. I shook my head and stepped forward not noticing I had been walking. I stepped on a twig at that moment. Again. Honestly, I was never this bad with the huge hole in my shoulder. I all but threw myself onto the ground to avoid her gaze. I avoided it, luckily. I think. I let out a rough sigh as she started to run. I hear a loud thud and push my body up off of the ground and look back over to her.

By this point Kenpachi, Byakuya, and Pineapple head had decided to show up. I gave a grumble as I climb to my feet, only to duck down to avoid shrapnel from the now gone tree. The girl had made it all but blow up when she ran into it. I can hear the pink haired lieutenant making sounds of approval. As I pick a piece of bark out of my hair and watch as the girl pushes the Captain's head to the side so she has a view to gaze at the Navy haired girl now laying on the ground. Kenpachi picked the girl up with one arm as I start to head back to the Ninth head quarters.

A hand against my chest stops me as a pass the group. I turn my head to look at the red haired man with all of the tattoos and the white head band. I look up into his eyes, trying to find the reason for his stopping me. "Lieutenant Abari. Who are you?" he asks. I blink my eyes once, watching as his eyes shifted from my gaze slightly.

"Tch," I reply shaking my head slightly. I push his hand off of me, internally wincing as his hand brushed my left shoulder, the tips of several fingers brushing where the hole used to be. "I didn't ask nor care," I tell him with a final shove of my hand.

My eyes linger on the girl in Kenpachi's hand. I hope she doesn't end up with Mayuri. No one deserved that. He was a monster. He could have made a very good Hollow. A very, very good one indeed. I continue walking, listening as the footsteps of the others fall in behind me. My walking was slower than theirs, my body quickly falling to the back. The things that I notice as walk was the lieutenant of Byakuya's division glancing back. His eyebrows were furrowed. Maybe he didn't like being treated like that. Whatever it was it was amusing. I ran my thin fingers through my hair, wrapping them around the strands.

"I'll take her to Uno-whatever whatever," I said to the higher ups. I knew the lady had the name. I just didn't know it. I didn't really bother committing names to my memory. At least not often. Kenpachi was saying something to someone. I'm not really paying attention though. I think it's for Yachiru though. I pull the girl out of his hands and carry her like a toddler. She wasn't hard to carry. It was a blessing considering I was short and I weighed in the double digits still. It was hard to eat anything but hollows and they weren't really very filling. The food Soul Society ate wasn't appealing to me either. I suppose I'd have to get used to it. Or die. Though dying didn't sound like a bad idea.

Soon I was at Uno-whogymafligits. I slid the screen open and walked into the Division. I followed a boy to a bed and sat the girl down. "Better than twelve," I whispered to her softly before giving a nod to the woman with the braid that seemed to be on the wrong side of her body. I slipped back out of the building before any one could ask anything. I had to say I didn't really want to fill anything out right now. Tests were sounding nice right about now. With that I set out to find Nemu.


	2. Chapter 2

**Mana's POV-**

Needless to say I don't find Nemu. No….That would be too easy for me. As I walk out of the place that I left the small girl I let out a slow breath. I raise a hand to my head and push my hair out of my face again. It still feels like the web of a spider, smooth and thin, always moving everywhere I don't want it to go. I merge into the crowd, quickly disappearing. My small feet moved quickly, trying to get back to the ninth headquarters before-

The heavy hand on my shoulder stopped me. It wasn't a usual human hand though. I was coming to know this hand. "Where did you think you were going? Did I tell you to go with them? Who was that?" the captain said turning me around. My eyes flashed up to the man who was hunched over to stare into my eyes with his own always wild ones. They shifted over to Nemu who was standing behind him.

"What makes you think I should tell you, Mayuri?" I ask him, crossing my arms. His arm places itself on my left shoulder, his fingers digging into the filled in hole. I feel my knees shake slightly, biting my lip to keep from doing something that wouldn't be good in public. It would probably sound like an explicit rap song.

"You're mine," he explains, lowering his head closer to mine. At this moment I have to say that I totally mean this. My right hand draws back before slamming into his metal face. The sound echo's across the street, heads turning to see what was happening.

"You do not own me you egotistical jack ass!" I hissed through my teeth, my hand falling back down to my side. My hand was throbbing slightly. More than slightly actually. I wasn't expecting his face to be that hard. I flex my fingers several times trying to get rid of the pain. It wasn't really working well. His face was obviously not damaged in any way and my hand was turning a lovely red color. I raise it slightly to look at it, turning it, observing the way it was feeling something. The sound was returning. People were murmuring and then there were some who were right out talking.

Then Mayuri seemed to realize what happened. His hand went to my hair, all but hoisting me up by it. As he begins to walk toward the Ninth division I try to get my heels to get some purchase in the ground. "You're no better than Haru," I mutter to him, my hands holding onto his wrist. There was no reply from him only Nemu's eyes on me, a soft glow behind them. Pity. That's what it was. She wasn't the only one feeling it right now. I knew I had tests that I had to do for Mayuri. It was my job here. I am a test rat.

My souls were unnatural and I was the first to have this done to. I needed to be monitored for others that they do this to. I was here to deal with the pain and the emotions so others wouldn't. No hollow wanted this. We may want feelings and the feeling of emptiness to be gone but this didn't fix it. It just didn't. I could feel my stomach wrenching almost the time. The guilt was terrible. I had killed so many people. I had done so many bad things. I was a terrible person and-

"Gah!" I yell as Mayuri gives me a hard yank by my hair, trying to get me to move faster. Getting pulled by your hair actually hurts. My finger nails dig into his wrist, trying to get him to let go. It wasn't working very well.

"Captain!" a voice yelled out to the man pulling me by my hair. "The meetings going to start soon and your presence is requested!" the person said, their feet sliding to a stop next to the three of us. I hear the captain make a sound of disapproval before dropping me to the ground. I give a groan as I roll over to my stomach. I watch as Mayuri walks away, Nemu following him. I knew she was going to wait outside the meeting for him. It's what she did. She never had a true life it seemed. Neither did I though.

I heaved a heavy sigh, looking down at the ground. I watch as my hair pools on the ground under me. I feel a large hand on my arm, hoisting me up to my feet. I pull my fingers through my hair and get the dust out before finally looking up at who told Mayuri about the meeting. It was the red haired Lieutenant again. I give a roll of my eyes before dusting my body off. "Meetings not for another hour," he said crossing his arms and looking down at me.

"So you just made him madder? Thanks," I tell him, the thanks dripping with sarcasm. This was great. Now on top of being mad for my insolence he'd also take it out on me or Nemu for him being an hour early for the meeting. Abari wasn't the sharpest sword in the Soul Societyapparently.

"You're going to be mad at me for getting him to drop you?" he asked, leering down at me. I nod my head with a sharp motion, regretting it when it made my scalp hurt. That was going to kill me later. I rub the top of my head slightly, hoping that would get it to reattach to my skull. "Last time I help you," he said throwing his hands up slightly before dropping them to his side.

"I never asked you to help me! I am capable of surviving on my own," I said with a shake of my head. The man rolled his eyes and turned walking the other direction. "Manashitsugmi," I said crossing my own arms. "That's my name for the record." With that I myself turned to start walking away. The ninth division was waiting for me along with several needles and a clip board filled with questions to my current well being. I figure the reason I told him my name was because I really hate being called Mayuri's white girl, or Mayuri's other girl. Even the all terrible, "Hey you! Over there! The short one!" I missed people calling me by my name. Only one person would call me by my name now but Haru was gone.

**Matsukis POV**  
>I see a man with black hair, green eyes, and a skull on his head. His white hand was stretched out towards me. Black fingernails shine in the dim light before he starts to disappear. I reached out towards him but by the time my hand reached where his was, he was gone.<p>

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><p>Suddenly I jerked awake to the feeling of something cold on my forehead. Looking up I see a person with brown eyes and black hair that was braided around her neck. I tried to speak but my voice came out in a squeak. She seemed to notice that I wanted to speak because she handed me a glass full of water.<p>

"Where am I?" I asked after I had taken a drink. My voice sounded like a little kids just like my body said I was.

"You are in the fourth division infirmary." She stated.

"Fourth division?" I asked softly looking around the white room.

"In the soul society. Can you tell me your name?" She asked me as she started to feel my neck and looked into my eyes.

"It's Matsuki." I stated doing as she asked and breathing deeply.

"Where are you from?" She inquired.

"No. All I know is my name." I said looking up at her as she 'Hmed'. She turned and walked out of the room, leaving me to wonder where she was going and if she knew anything about me.

I decided to walk around cause my legs were starting to go to sleep. I looked down the halls on either side of my door before picking the one to my right. As I walked down the hall I heard some people shouting before a group of people came running down the hall almost knocking me over. I ended up huddled against the wall.

"Excuse me? Are you ok?" I heard a stuttering voice ask. I looked up to see a skinny man that looked like he hadn't had a good night sleep.

"I'm fine." I stated softly as I stood and ran away from him. I didn't like him. I don't know why but he scared me. I ran out of the building and into the crowded street almost running into people as I weaved my way through the thick crowd.

"Hey where do you think you're going?" I heard a deep voice ask. I kept on running too scared to do anything else. My heart pounded in my ears as I ran into a dark ally and was stuck at a dead end. Looking around I see a small crate and crawled in trying to hide from everything. I saw a dark shadow block the little light that did get into the ally before a pink haired girl popped up at the entrance of my hiding place.

"Hey Kenny I found her." She said smiling. I tried to press myself further into the cage but I was already at the back. I tried to find an escape, but when I found none I just stayed put hoping they would give up on me.

"Yachiru, back up. You're scaring her." The deep voice said again. The girl who I now know is named Yachiru backed up with a small frown before looking up and smiling.

"How are we going to get her out then Kenny?" She asked. I heard him sigh before a large hand scooped up the girl and heavy footsteps started to lead away from me. I sighed before I decided to go to sleep in the crate.

**Mana's POV-**

Several hours had passed since I had the run in with the lieutenant that looked like he had a pineapple tuck on the top of his head. I had spent a good hour wandering around, all but wallowing in my self pity and guilt. Soon enough the meeting had let out and Mayuri had found me. He was mad. As I had figured. Nemu had held him off from dragging either of us down the street. We traveled back to the Ninth Division headquarters, not stopping in any room before disappearing into the depths of the building.

I lay my body back on the table, taking a deep breath as I do so. I had changed clothes as Mayuri and Nemu had prepared everything. My old Espada clothes served as good clothes for his experiments he did on me now a days. The top left most of my body bare and from where there had been a bit of a scuffle a couple weeks ago between me and him the legs of it were ripped off. Nemu had hemmed them when Mayuri wasn't paying attention. The truth is everytime I lay back on this table I get terrified.

I close my eyes, trying to focus on a memory to ignore the poking and prodding from the man. If I was lucky I fell asleep. That's what I am trying to do. I close my eyes, biting my full bottom lip roughly. His hands weren't exactly the warmest things to have poking around on a body. Memory. Memory. What was the last good one I had? Ah. There it was. I let out a slow breath focusing everything on that one moment in my mind.

_I was dancing. It wasn't a rare thing back when I was in Hueco Mundo. It took up time that I used to spend killing things or devouring other hollows. My bare feet spun gracefully on the cold tile floor of the throne room that was once used by Aizen. My long white hair was pulled into a braid that hung down over my right shoulder, bumping into my arm every so often as I spun. I was humming softly to myself, giving me something to move to. I could hear the footsteps of other people in the building._

_There were the light footsteps of Nel, the heavier more aggravated ones of Grimmjow, then the most familiar ones. They were heavy but gentle. The thumps they made were never longer than a millisecond long. I Felt a pair of arms wrap around my body, a familiar action. I felt the mouth against my neck, completely bypassing any gentle kisses that most would leave. Instead it brought a set of teeth into the soft skin leaving a moment of searing pain before having it soothed with the soft feeling of his lips. "You're mine." At that point in my life I didn't mind those words. They always made some sense of feeling come up. I knew the way he meant them. It wasn't love, it was possession at it's purest form. Haru got mad if I even so much touched or was touched by anyone. IT didn't matter if it was innocent or a bit less innocent._

_I didn't want to leave him. Which was why I all but followed him to my undoing. Our relationship had been what one could call normal until we figured out, or more he figured out being together staved off the empty feelings. The others did the same things. I grew accustomed to waking up with scratches on my back and bruises on my body from those same teeth that had just sunk into my neck. They were so familiar, which was why I didn't make any noises when he did what he did. "Always," I muttered, the same exchange that had happened so many times before._

_His right hand moved from my waist to run down my, digging his fingers into the flesh for a moment before letting go of me completely. "Don't forget it," He ordered before turning and walking back out the way he came in. I raised my hand to trace the bruise forming on my neck. I had to say they weren't the greatest thing in the world. Especially since compared to everywhere else my neck was my weak point. It was where I actually felt pain. Standing there in the throne room I should have realized that the calm that the entire world of Hollows was experiencing would only last for so long._

I was woken up by a swift shove, my body ending up on the cold floor. I had in fact fallen asleep and slept through the procedures. I push myself up to my knees and take a deep breath. I place my hand on my neck, feeling the thick bandage that rested at the base of it, covering part of my shoulder. Nemu was the only one left in the room seeing as Mayuri was done with me. "I am supposed to find what you eat again," the girl explained softly. It wasn't like a meek thing. She knew what was going to happen and it was. I'm not about to disagree with her.

I quickly change back into my uniform, wincing slightly as the fabric runs up against the bruises that some of the other needles and god knows what else had left. The fabric did cover them all, save for the large bandage placed on my neck. I Follow Nemu out of the room, staying quiet for our walk. I hated having to use Haru to ignore things. I hated it. I didn't want to think about him. I wanted to erase him from my mind completely. Obviously it wasn't working.

The thing about the food was simple. Mayuri was tired of me losing weight and him having to all but cram food down my throat. The different divisions usually had different types of had already exhausted the Ninth, the Fourth, the Third and the tenth. They had all told him not to come back with me unless it was just me and Nemu. So that's what we had been doing. Today was the eleventh. I found little enjoyment out of all of this. Compared to souls and hollows…food was empty. It was terrible. There was nothing to it.

I follow Nemu into the Eleventh headquarters and listen to the voices. "He was dragging her down thes street by her hair and she gets mad at me," a familiar voice says. Fabulous. Pineapple head was here too. I roll my eyes as Nemu and I make it into the room. "Is every person in the Ninth Division a loon?"

A man with black hair and feathers sticking up off of the corner of one of his eyes looks over at me and Nemu. My eyes hold no glare, they hold nothing for him to get any emotion from. I'm not feeling anything, nothing other than the usual guilt and boredom. "Sit and eat Renji. Before you dig yourself a bigger hole," the guy says giving me the last part to the Lieutenants name. I wait for the division to sit down before me and Nemu find a place to sit. My body plops itself down next to the man with black hair and the feathers. The captain is sitting at the end of the table, a crate settled next to him. I ignore it for the most part.

I fiddle with the hem of my sleeve while Nemu grabs things off of plates a look of disgust on her features at times. I glance over to her only to catch the eye of the insufferable pineapple haired boy again. He looks away quickly, returning to his conversation with a rather bald man. A plate is set down in front of me with several different things of food sitting on it. They were only enough for one bite of each. They still didn't seem appetizing at all.

First something simple-ish. A grape. That would work. I pick it up and take a small bite out of it, only to plop it back down on the plate, my nose scrunched up with disgust. "I can't do this Nemu," I say quietly to the girl sitting next to me. "Just tell Chameleon boy that I ate," I plead with her. She shakes her head. I Knew it. I actually have to find something I can eat. I give a tiny groan, causing the boy next to me to turn and look at me. When I look up at him he turns back to his conversation, only a moment of eye contact between us.

Fifteen minutes later I had forced myself to swallow the test that was bread. Just no. No. I couldn't eat this. Give me a soul or something! C'mon, I wasn't made to eat this stuff. I place my boney fingers on my temples and move them in circular motions. I feel a small thump on my shoulder to see it's the pretty boy next to me. He's holding some form of pretzel stick out that's covered in chocolate. I tentatively take it out of his hand, almost as though I'm worried it would burn me. I chip a small piece off and don't have the urge to spit it out. I take another small bite off of the end and scrunch up my eyebrows. I sit it down on the plate and look over to him. He was looking away. I was used to the taste of skin and souls and…This was a terrible idea.

I take his face in both of my hands and pull his face down to my level, running my tongue up the side of his face slowly. I was comparing the tastes between the two items. The thing he handed me was actually better. Though he tasted better than the rest of the food on my plate. I plop back down with a pleased smile on my face and pick the stick back up. Nemu looks over at me and jots down a single word on a note book. 'Pocky.' Whatever that was….I break a piece of the stick off and look back over to the guy next to me again. His face was a shade that matched blood. "Thanks for this," I say waving the stick around, not totally sure what to call it. "It tastes much better than you, you know," I explain settling into my seat munching on the last of it.

"I told you, loons," Renji mutters from his spot before shutting his mouth up with a piece of bread. He was still looking at me from the corners of his eyes. After I finish the stick I run my toungue over my lips. I hadn't had anything that good since the first soul I devoured. This had to be good. It had to.


	3. Chapter 3

**Mana's POV**

I was still sitting next to the black haired kid. After licking up the side of his face he had recovered and told me his name. Yumichika Aysegawa. He was cool. Only for the fact that he insulted everyone at the table. That and he kept giving me those stick things. He would only give up one at a time though. It was like he was worried that I was going to eat them all in one bite. Which honestly that didn't sound like such a bad idea. I felt like myself. I felt like a bird. I watched them in the mortal world. They would follow a hand for food. Despite how silly it was it was nice to feel the way I once did.

He hands me another one, an amused smirk tugging on his lips. "How long has it been since you've eaten something?" he asks, a slight laugh on the end of it. As I munch on the chocolate covered stick I think about it. How long had it been? I was living the last time and I had been a hollow for how long? Several hundred years at least. That's what Aizen had told me. I had asked him my age once. He said I wasn't exactly young.

"Awhile," was my simple answer. He didn't need to know anything. I snatched another one of the things out of his hand, not noticing as my sleeve fell slightly, the bottom of the numbers showing. I pull the stick out of his hand, dropping my left arm to my lap. I shift uncomfortably for a moment before deciding no one noticed. That was until I shift my eyes across the table to find the same red haired freak looking at me.

"Isn't baldy there talking to you?" I ask him, pointing a finger to the man who was currently trying to get his attention.

"What are you even doing here?" he asks, ignoring the bald man next to him who promptly gave a grumble and leans on his hand. I'm not completely sure what the parameters of his question is. Is it why am I in this room? Then I would ask the same back to him. He wasn't in the eleventh. Or why am I there in general? That would be harder to answer. I wasn't supposed to be there. I certainly didn't want to be there in all honesty. I was tossed around like a rag doll by a psychopath because I was more afraid of him telling everyone what I was. There were days when I listened to people talk about my people. They called us monsters. They said we all needed to die.

There was something about that that now hurt. They didn't know how it felt to live the way we did. There was nothing this or any world held for us other than the need for something more. There was rarely an emotion other than anger and then with Haru possessiveness. That I think only spawned from the fact that I could be taken away by Grimmjow in a blink of an eye to cure his loneliness. There weren't any large emotions toward anyone or anything. We tried to get the feelings back. Tried to feel full again. They knew the basics of us. We had holes because we were empty. They didn't know what empty felt like though. The never had to feel that. Maybe the orange haired strawberry kid did, the one with half a hollow in him. It wasn't…it wasn't the same though. He only had to feel that for moments in his life.

This is, was, an everyday thing for me. Even now, sitting here, staring at Renji, I could barely breath. The weight of everything was pressing down on my chest. "You're right. What am I doing here?" I say standing up. I give a smile to the room before remembering something Mayuri wanted the Spikey haired oaf to know. I made my way over to him, forgetting about the crate setting next to him. Thus leaving me to kick it over. The small body of a girl tumbled out, a groan slipping from her lips as she woke up. "Tch…." I say kicking the crate out of the way. "My moron of a captain said that old man Yamamoto wanted to see the captains next week about the Hogyoku," I say, crossing my arms over my chest and looking down at the girl.

"Hogyoku isn't a problem. It's locked up," Kenpachi says. Alright. My lack of respect for everyone in this room was apparent but I didn't laugh at them. At least not until…now. It started out with a small giggle before becoming a full scale round of laughter. With a grin on my face I stuck my tongue out at him.

"Wouldn't you like to know?" I ask, the grin weaving its way into my voice.

"Who are you?" the girl laying on the floor asked, finally sitting up and looking around the room. She gave a sleepy yawn, rubbing her eyes slightly. She looks up at me and blinks her eyes several times. I scratch the back of my head and give a shrug. I hadn't quite figured that out yet.

"I'll tell you when I figure that out," I say. I hear a familiar set of footsteps coming, belonging to my captain. I quickly drop to my stomach and roll under the table. I didn't want to deal with him. Nemu's feet quickly retreated before Mayuri could arrive. I waited a minute, listening to the idle chatter of the small girl and the thick headed captain behind enough I felt safe enough to wiggle my way out from under the overly low table.

I slid out from under it and back to my spot next to Yumichika. My pale hair is falling everywhere, most of it in front of my eyes. I blow it out of my face to no avail, finally settling on pushing it behind my ears. I rub my neck, my fingers catching on the large white bandage. I pull it off with a yank, grimacing slightly as I do so. I fold it up and throw it in the trash can by the door, pleased with my ability to throw that far. I run my fingers over the new needle wounds. They formed lumps under my skin from whatever he put in through them. It felt like pebbles under my skin. I would believe that if it wasn't for the fact they had this nasty habit of bleeding. A couple hours and they would be gone though. I'd be fine and they'd be just another scar. I pull my hair over my shoulder, covering them from other peoples view. I really…I just didn't want to think about this. I missed my old life, even with Haru being a jerk.

**Matsukis POV**  
>It's one thing to be rudely awoken in a place you know but to be rudely awoken in a place you don't know…it just sucks. I look around the room to see that everyone but the pale haired girl is looking at the large man that was sitting at the end of the table. I looked up at the pale haired girl for a second before she seemed familiar.<p>

"Who are you?" I asked. She looked down at me for a couple minutes before she answered.

"I'll tell you when I figure that out," Her back suddenly went straight before she dropped to her stomach and rolled under the table. I shrugged and looked at the big man by my side.

"Did you bring me here?" I asked. My voice sounded like a kids, still. Who am I? Where are my mother and father, WHO where my mother and father? I see these little snippets of memories…I think but it's not enough to tell me anything.

"Yes." He answered roughly.

"Do you know who I am?" I asked tilting my head to the side.

"No." He answered just as roughly. I sighed and looked at the girl under the table before a man with weird eyes stuck his head into the room. He looked around the room both his eyes going in different directions before he sighed and left.

"Who was that?" I asked softly afraid that he could still hear me.

"Captain Mayuri." The man stated again.

"What's your name?" I asked this time watching as the girl rolled back out from under the table to sit with the man with feathers on his head.

"Kenpachi." He stated simply. I watched as the pale haired girl pulled some bandages off of her neck and throw them into the trashcan. How do I know what all these things are called yet I can't remember who I am? It's annoying I'll tell you that.  
>The girl prodded her neck with her fingers and I saw little lumps being moved when she poked it. She pulled her hair over her shoulders before I could get a better look. I yawned again before I stood and walked over to the girl.<p>

"What's your name?" I asked tugging on her sleeve.

"You can just call me Mana. It's too long for you to be able to pronounce it." She stated. I huffed and looked down at my feet.

"Do you know who I am?" I asked this time keeping my eyes on my feet. She simply stated "No" before taking another stick from the feather man. I sighed and made my way back to Chichi. Yes I just came up with that so don't ask I like it. I looked around the room as I walked noticing that most of the people were men. Only two were girls. The pineapple head kept on looking at Mana. He's in love I can tell. Halfway back my tummy growled loudly and I stopped where I was looking down at my stomach and I was sure that I was blushing.

Mana's POV-

I watch as the girl returns to her spot by Zaraki. Seemed like she had already attached herself to him. I give a slight shake of my head before seeing another one of those sticks drop in front of my face, dangling from the fingers of Yumichika. I give a smile before reaching up and taking it from him. I place the tip of it between my lips, holding it there while I situate myself back into my spot. I fold my legs up under me and look at the stick balancing between my lips. It was going to break if it wasn't careful. Which it was about ready to fall.

As the thing tumble down from its spot nestled inbetween my lips I catch it with an outstretched hand. I shake my head slightly before breaking the thing into pieces and placing it into my mouth. "So what happened with the Hogyoku?" Yumichika asks, leaning down close, his words nothing more than a whisper in my ear. I blink my eyes twice images flashing through my head. There's me looking up at Haru. Him patting my head then him smiling as he leaves me in the hands of Mayuri.

I gulp, swallowing the emotions that were floating up. "I'm sure he'll tell you later," I say with a shake of my head and a slight smile. Subconsciously I rub the place on my shoulder. I give my hand a shake and let it drop back to my lap like nothing happened. It was a normal movement. Completely normal…not. Of course not. Overthinking things again aren't i? "Positive he will," I say picking the cup up off of the table. I wasn't sure what was in it. I didn't really care. I needed something to occupy my mouth. I was starting to notice how easy it would be to slip up and say something more than incriminating.

I place the rim against my lips and take a drink, cringing as the flavorless liquid flooded down my throat. Several drops escaped from the slight parting of my lips as I sit the cup back down on the table. I lick my lips to remove the excess water that was starting to drip off of them and down to my chin. I still didn't like water but at least it wasn't terrible like tea. Tea was awful. I pull myself up to my feet, arching my back listening as it cracked in multiple places.

"I should get back. Crazy doesn't like it when he cant find me," I say with a nod. A couple guys shift uncomfortably where they sit. Ah. Right. I have a lack of respect. I give a glance across the room, never landing on any face too long. I turn my body and head out of the room. I had rounds that night. Mayuri was curious as to how I would handle them. He loved seeing how I acted with other people. Sometimes it'd just be me though. As I slide the door to the eleventh division open I glance back behind me, my own purple eyes locking on to the muddy brown ones of a certain man. I scrunch my eyebrows up slightly before heading out the door.

Renji Abarai made me feel something different than everything else. He made me mad, he made me frustrated. In the three conversations I'd had with him two of which I'd wanted to punch him. He was infuriating to me. He treated me the way i…well I do treat the rest of the world that way. I suppose that's it. He made me feel something different. Yumichika did the same thing. He made me want to laugh. That was different than anything else though. I cant remember the last time I honestly laughed. I never did when I fought or when I danced. I couldn't laugh with Haru and I never felt the urge to do it anywhere else.

The trip back to the twelfth division was a short one. The large building grew in front of me, the gold gate glistening in the late afternoon sunlight. It was large compared to some of the other divisions, probably just for the fact it also held the research center. The place is nice. It'd be nicer if it wasn't run by a lunatic but, well, I have a good history with them. With a creak I push the door open and slip inside. The courtyard was empty, like usual. Everyone stayed inside for the most part. Now I just had to creep into my room and get to my bed. I'm not really looking forward to the rounds tonight. They were mundane and nothing ever happened. Part of me hoped I would see Haru, different reasons of course.

Not love. Hate. The same feelings he held toward Aizen for all that time. I understand more why he did what he did. I didn't like it but I understood it. I slip into the building after crossing the courtyard. The soft thuds of my feet could be heard if anyone was paying close enough attention. I'm praying no one is. I cringe when a floor board creaks. I'm so close to my door. If I can just make it to my door. After a moment I give up on being sneaky and dart toward the screen. I slide it open far enough for me to get in and then shut it swiftly behind me. "Victory," I congratulate myself, my hands on my hips. I back up several steps and let my body fall down onto the bed, luckily. I had a bad problem of thinking I was going to land on the mat only to collapse onto the floor in a lump with a groan. I didn't really move when that happened. I shut my eyes, my hair falling around me on the pillow, I'd have to brush it when I got up. As I feel my body start to shut down I have a passing thought of who I was going to be stuck with on rounds. It was never the same person twice. Apparently I wasn't the most enjoyable person to do rounds with.


End file.
